Do you agree with the following statements? Why?

1. Society would not exist without marriage.

4. Marriage is unnecessary.

5. Marriage is important for children.

6. Marriage keeps couples together.

7. Marriage restricts freedom.

8. A lot of married people get divorced.

5. Develop the following situations making up dialogues:

1. Jill met a soldier at a dance on Friday. Now it is Sunday, only 2 days later and she

wants to marry him. She is speaking to her mother.

2. It is Richard’s wedding anniversary today, but he has just come home without any

flowers.

3. Lady Caroline Ottoway is 22. She leads a very independent life in London where

she lives and works. She enjoys it very much. Her mother, however is worried because she hasn’t got married yet and not thinking of it. Last week she introduced Caroline to the 30^th earl of Mounteback, no chin, very little hair, and interesting only in hunting pheasants and collecting butterflies. Now they are discussing Lady Caroline’s last date with him.

4. Your friend, Tessa, is engaged to marry Jim. But she has lately met and fallen in

love with another man. She doesn’t want to upset Jim. She asks you for advice.

6. Solve this problem:

You are a counseling psychologist. You have to answer the following letters:

1. My father-in-law died about two years ago. Of course my mother-in-law was very

upset and lonely, so my husband invited her to live with us. I don’t know what to do – I’m going crazy. My mother –in-law and I don’t get along very well. She’s a wonderful person and is very helpful to me in many ways, but she thinks she’s the boss in our home. If I try to discipline the children and tell them that they can’t do something, they go running to their grandmother and she tells them they can do it! My husband and I have no privacy. What’s worse is that she constantly criticizes me to my husband behind my back. I’m afraid this is going to break up our marriage. What should I do?

7. Translate into English:

К несчастным брачным союзам часто приводят попытки избавиться посредством женитьбы от чувства одиночества, депрессии или комплекса неполноценности, стремления ощутить себя нужным, желанным и привлекательным, обрести счастье в собственной семье или вырваться из опостылевшей родительской опеки. Многие люди женятся из-под опостылевшей родительской опеки. Многие люди женятся из-за того, что «так поступают все взрослые», «все приятели уже давно переженились», «не хочется прожить последние дни старым холостяком или старой девой» или просто «от нечего делать». Иногда главной причиной для заключения брака является стремление иметь постоянного сексуального партнера или чувство долга из-за «случившегося» физической близости. Частым и порой единственным резоном для женитьбы становится богатство и высокое положение одного из супругов. Бывает и так, что люди не в состоянии ответить отказом на брачное предложение из-за боязни оскорбить чувства другого человека или соглашаются на брак, боясь потерять возлюбленного или возлюбленную, Во всех этих ситуациях бывают счастливые исключения, но в подавляющем большинстве люди впоследствии вспоминают о своем решении как о серьезной ошибке.

8. Speak on the following topics:

1. On love and marriage.

2. Teenage marriages.

UNIT 7

FAMILY PROBLEMS

Learn these words:

Text A:

Pre-text activity 1:

1. In what way is the family very often defined? Give your own definition of the family.

2. What is primary function of the family?

3. Why do you think so many couples divorce nowadays?

4. Would you feel happier in a large or a small family?

1. Read and translate the text:

FAMILY LIFE

Marriage is a thing which only a rare person in his or her life avoids. True bachelors and spinsters make up only a small percent of the population; most single people are "alone but not lonely".

Millions of others get married because of the fun of family life. And it is fun, if one takes it with a sense of humour.

There's a lot of fun in falling in love with someone and chasing the prospective fiancee, which means dating and going out with the candidate. All the relatives (parents, grandparents and great-grandparents, brothers and sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, stepmothers and stepfathers and all in-laws) meanwhile have the fun of criticizing your choice and giving advice. The trick here is not to listen to them but propose to your bride-to-be and somehow get her to accept your proposal. Then you may arrange the engagement and fix the day of the wedding.

What fun it is to get all those things, whose names start with the word "wedding"— dress, rings, cars,flowers, cakes, etc.! It's great fun to pay for them.

It's fun for the bride and the groom to escape from the guests and go on a honeymoon trip, especially if it is a wedding present from the parents. The guests remain with the fun of gossiping whether you married for love or for money.

It's fun to return back home with the idea that the person you are married to is somewhat different from the one you knew. But there is no time to think about it because you are newly-weds and you expect a baby.

There is no better fun for ahusband than taking hiswife to a maternity home alone and bringing her back with thetwins or triplets.

And this is where the greatest fun starts:washing the new-born's nappies andpassing away sleepless nights, earning money to keep the family, taking childrento kindergarten and laterto school. By all means it's fun toattend parents' meetings and to learn that your childrentake after you and don'tdo well at school.

The bigger your children grow, the more they resemble you outwardly and the less they display likeness with you inwardly. And you startgrumbling at them and discussing with your old friends the problem of the "generation gap". What fun!

And when at last you and your grey-haired spouse start thinking that your family life has calmed down, you haven't divorced but preserved your union, the climax of your fun bursts out! One of your dearest offsprings brings a long-legged blonde to your house and says that he wants to marry. And you think: “Why do people ever get married?”

2. Discuss the following questions:

1. Do you support the optimistic view on the family? Is it really fun to be married?

2. Do you agree that “A good husband should be deaf and a good wife should be blind”? Why?

3. How do you understand this statement: “A good wife makes a good husband”.

3. Find English equivalents for:

влюбиться; встречаться; давать совет; критиковать ваш выбор; принять предложение; свадебное путешествие, свадебные подарки; проводить бессонные ночи; иметь внешнее сходство; ворчать; отпрыск.

4. Brain teaser. Find out who is married to whom:

Alan is Caroline’s nephew and Larry’s cousin.

Barbara is Larry’s mother and Maggie’s sister-in-law.

Caroline is Edward’s daughter and Maggie’s sister-in-law.

David is Gordon’s brother-in-law and Alan’s uncle.

Edward is Ingrid’s grandfather and Maggie’s father-in-law.

Fanny is Caroline’s mother and Alan’s grandmother.

Gordon is Helen’s son-in-law and Nigel’s brother-in-law.

Helen is Barbara’s mother-in-law and Larry’s grandmother.

Ingrid is Gordon’s niece and David’s daughter-in-law.

John is David’s father and Gordon’s father-in-law.

Karen is Gordon’s daughter-in-law and Maggie’s daughter-in-law.

Larry is John’s grandson and David’s son.

Maggie is Larry’s aunt and Fanny’s daughter-in-law.

Nigel is Ingrid’s father and Fanny’s son-in-law.

Text B:

Pre-text activity 2:

1. What are the chief problems facing the families?

2.. Do you know how to make a family happy?

3. Read and translate the text:

WHAT’S HAPPENING TO THE FAMILY?

«If you are going to marry one day think of the possible divorce», — those were exactly the words that the mother of a family quite happy in our understanding told her daughter. Alas, nobody can be sure to avoid the divorce at any stage of the married life. Conditions that destroy the family exist too long. With almost total poverty a child can't be afforded by many. Every family having children knows well how much you should pay for clothes, food, creche, kindergarten and now even school. But the financial problem is not the only one. There may be hardly a person who has never faced the problem of living conditions. And the heaven in a nut can’t last forever, even if you are with someone you love. A woman is so busy that she simply has no time to communicate at any level except domestic and she is bringing her children up over telephone; these reasons can't but make the atmosphere at home formal. And not all can overcome the pressure which is growing up every year, but no matter who says desperately: «I can't stand it any longer, I want a divorce», blaming her husband (or the wife) for all troubles, yet all further problems will fall upon the woman's head. Sometimes women are naive to believe that a man can't leave the children. «He is fond of them». And this may be true. Yet a man is different from a woman, he has no biological need in seeing his child constantly. And when the former wife threatens: «You will never see your child again», wishing to cause repentance and fear she may achieve quite an opposite effect.

A man can be boasting with his wonderful grown-up son not seeing him for years without any feeling of loss, but the former wife will call for his paternal feelings in vain when she needs any form of help. Not every man, even very strong and kind is capable for the daily-round deed. Therefore it is not wise to make the man marry just to legalize relations that caused «incidental» pregnancy. The sense of duty will scarcely transform into the feeling of love. And the man will subconsciously feel that he is deceived. Such marriage can hardly be safe.

A child will add to the family happiness only if he is loved and expected by both parents and not a burden for the young family. So a woman should be very prescient when choosing the husband and account the situation when she may be left alone. Where shall I live? Unfortunately many couples for years stay under the same roof after the divorce. There are strong doubts that a man will be generous enough to leave everything including his flat to his wife: he often has no place to go. How to make living? There are women — and many-who do not think of their career after marriage supposing it their husband's duty to support the family. In case of a divorce these women risk to be left without means of subsistence, and sometimes it may be too late to get a new profession.

So a woman has no right to be thoughtless about marriage, because finally in the family she has to fulfil most part of work over the house, to take care of children, to earn the same money as men and in case of divorce even worse troubles fall to her lot. They often say that there are catastrophically many lonely women. That's right, there are a lot of lonely women. But is it actually a catastrophe? Perhaps women who have considered all variants decided that of two evils to be alone is less than together with a child without father or with her former husband in one room?

Has the family died then? Perhaps it will be more proper to say that it has changed in quality though has suffered losses in quantity. And the main reason for this is that a woman has changed. She is not satisfied with the role of a housekeeper. She wants to have a speciality, she does not want to be dependent on another person. She has her own opinion, own hobby, she is interesting. And you may meet a lot of happy families based exclusively on mutual interests and respect. Among these couples there are childless as well but it does not form vacuum in the family because each of them is self-valuable and interesting to the other. As for the question of children — to have or not to have — each family should decide it for itself, jointly. Then even the thought of divorce won't arise. So whom to marry? Only the one whose way of thinking is close to yours, a man who is your friend, who respects a woman and personality in you. But for this you have to be such.

2. Answer the following questions:

1. What is it necessary for a family to be happy? Give your ideas.

2. How does a woman often bring up her children?

3. What is the difference between a man and a woman concerning the children?

4. Do sense of duty and a feeling of love mean too much for a man? What do you think?

5. What expects a woman in case of a divorce?

6. Must a woman work after the marriage or not? Express your personal opinion.

7. What must a future wife be prepared for?

8. Why do many women remain lonely throughout their life-span?

9. How has a woman changed nowadays?

10. Whom does the author recommend to marry?

3. Give English equivalents for:

на любой стадии; условия жизни; бывшая жена; хвастаться; чувство потери; подсознательно; напрасно; чувство долга; бремя; большие сомнения; средства существования; заботиться; из двух зол; нести потери; заполнить вакуум.

4. Find in the text synonyms for:

to ruin; to rear; to love; to tell a lie; to look after; to regard; to be pleased; to appear.

5. Discuss the following questions:

1. Do you think it is possible to remake one’s marriage? How?

2. Should we forbid divorces? Why?

3. What can be divorce consequences?

4. Do we have a lot of single-parent families? Why?

5. How does a single-parent family influence children’s achievements?

6. Develop the following situations making up dialogues:

1. Your husband beats you, but with eight children he is your only means of financial support. Your mother comes over to visit you and asks why you are bruised. What’s your reply?

2. You and your wife have been married for five years. You’ve been very happy but lately you have begun to feel very attracted towards another woman. Your wife asks you if anything is wrong. What do you say?

3. You are going to call off the engagement. What do you say to your boy/girlfriend?

4. You are a reporter of the Daily mail Gossip Column. You are going to interview Elizabeth Smith and Richard Brenton, the famous film stars, who got divorced last year but who, according to rumour, are planning to remarry. What questions would you ask them?

4. Solve this problem:

You are a counseling psychologist. You have to answer the following letter:

I am 28 and have been married for seven years. I have two lovely children aged six and four. My problem is that I have fallen out of love with my husband. He does nothing to help in the house, watches TV all the time and drinks too much. He also had an affair with his secretary a few years ago. I nearly left him but I stayed because of the children. I don’t want to spend the rest of my days with somebody I don’t love but I know my children need both their parents. Please tell me what to do.

5. Translate into English:

В последние десятилетия развод стал довольно заурядным явлением. Понимают ли супруги, решившие расстаться, что даже в самом благополучном браке неизбежны разочарования, конфликты, периоды взаимной неудовлетворенности и просто полосы неудач? Все это несет в себе огромный потенциал для конструктивных перемен, способных сделать семейный союз значительно глубже и прочнее. Практически любой брак можно сохранить, если оба партнера приложат необходимые усилия к тому, чтобы изменить что-то в себе и своих взаимоотношениях. Даже если в этом направлении активно работает только один из супругов, можно добиться ощутимого прогресса в укреплении семьи.

6. Speak on the following topics:

1. Family life.

2. What’s happening to the family?

UNIT 8

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